thebootydiaries:

someone: hey how are you

me: moderate to severe

thebootydiaries:

women’s shampoos be like: coconut; honey/milk; rose; tropical fruits; aloe vera

men’s shampoos be like: ARCTIC ICE; DARKNESS; GUNS; TESTOSTERONE; PAIN

kelssiel:

automaticfave:

redactedkondraki:

automaticfave:

someone who’s chaotic good (me) should never be allowed to run a bakery by themself (my job)

Why

well I work for a bakery inside a grocery store and we end up composting a Lot of stuff because it’s a commercial chain and they don’t care because capitalism

so every night an hour before closing, I look thru all the stuff to see what expires the next day, and I make it “free samples”

then I hang around by the cookie table and the donut case and whenever kids come around talking to their friends abt “if they don’t buy this, they can afford that,” “do we have enough money to buy donuts?” etc, I chime in and I’m like….

hey…free samples over there take as many as u want…..take the whole thing….just eat them before u leave the store…..go…run…eat pastries….be free

you are exactly the kind of person i wanna see running a bakery